| To clarify your particular situation and where you must proceed,
several needs-areas are presented, followed by some leading questions
for thought and discussion. Be honest with yourself as you approach
them. Think as creatively as you can in developing your own particular
approach for their resolution.
The need to reassess your care-receiver's needs
You now possess new information and perspective regarding aging,
illness, attitudes and expectations that may, in some ways, make
you see your elderly care-receiver in a fresh and different light.
Ask yourself: How much of my elder's dependencies are due to illness
or infirmity? How much are instead a function of personality, habit
or coping style? Am I or my family reinforcing dependent behavior,
when my elder is perhaps both anxious and able to be more independent?
Have I presumed that certain illnesses or infirmities exist, or
have they been verified through appropriate medical and health-related
assessments? Are there perhaps some problems that can be corrected
by: making some changes in my elder's living environment; seeking
medical attention or health-related management of certain illnesses,
conditions or symptoms; or simply acknowledging them as natural
and inevitable, given the elder's perspective and treating them
accordingly? Might a comprehensive medical, psychosocial or human
service evaluation be in order to help sift out the answers to some
of these questions? Have you ever asked your elder how he or she
interprets his or her own needs? Has your opinion or attitude toward
your care receiver's condition changed since your involvement in
reading this material? If so, how? What if anything might your answers
to these questions prompt you to do next?
The need for emotional support
It is clear that the stresses and strains involved in caregiving
can be burdensome and, at times, overwhelming, whether assumed willingly
and lovingly or acquired by default. Feelings of guilt, dread, frustration,
helplessness, anger or sorrow are not uncommon and should not be
interpreted as signs of weakness. Most times, such feelings are
cyclical or situational and resolve themselves with the passage
of time. Other times, they become dysfunctional and begin to interfere
with the business of day-to-day living.
Ask yourself these questions: What signs tell me that I and/or
my care-receiver have reached our limits? What other stresses, apart
from caregiving, may be affecting me? How does my, stress affect
me, my family, my friends, my co-workers and my care-receiver? Do
I spend an inordinate amount of time crying, moping,, and feeling
blue, uneasy or anxious? Does my care-receiver do likewise? Do I
experience my stress physically? How do I relieve my tension? What
does my care-receiver do to work through his or her stress? Can
other family members share in my caregiving responsibilities? Could
I, my family, or my care-receiver benefit from some kind of support
group, counseling or mental health enhancement service? What, if
anything, might your answers to these questions prompt you to do
next?
The need for community services
The resources section of the website provides information and guidance
about finding and using various community services that can assist
caregivers. Ask yourself the following questions: What community
services, if any, seem relevant for my situation? Are these services
available in my community? If not, what other options are there?
What kinds of information do I need when attempting to use the particular
services I might pursue? What other options are available if we
are not eligible for the necessary services? Am I willing to use
community support services to assist me in my caregiving responsibilities?
Why or why not? How would my care-receiver react to the introduction
of community service supports to his care regime? What, if anything,
might your answers to these questions prompt you to do next? List
your questions, note the steps you must take and identify where
you will go for assistance.
The need for more information
The topics that were chosen for this guide reflect important needs
that caregivers of frail elders are presumed to have. Each of these
broad topics, however, touches on several sub-issues, many of which
raise additional questions, concerns or points of interest to explore.
Ask yourself the following questions: Might I benefit from more
information regarding such issues as: home health care options versus
institutional placement; whether, when and how to relocate the care-receiver
to a nursing home; medication use and misuse; family communication
skills; communicating with professional care networks; legal aspects
of caregiving; health insurance and entitlements; the management
of certain illnesses, behaviors or conditions; stress management;
other topics of special interest or relevance? Where would I go
to get such information? What, if anything, might your answers to
these questions prompt you to do next? List your needs, note the
steps you must take to get the needed information, and identify
where you will go for assistance.
Remember, your local Area Agency on Aging is always one of your
most valuable resources. Use it.
The need for social action
Your most pressing need as a caregiver may be to accomplish your
task on a day-to-day basis. Therefore, it is important to remember
that advocating for greater recognition and social action regarding
the needs of caregivers and their dependent elders on local, state
and federal levels is also critically important. Ask yourself the
following questions: Who, other than my relatives and friends, should
know about the difficulties and the benefits of caring for dependent
elders at home? What should these individuals be told? Who are my
local and statewide human service commissioners, legislators and
advocates? How do I get their attention? What, if anything, might
your answers to these questions prompt you to do next? |
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